Joseph's Dilemma

A Christmas Story

Dec 22, 2024

DISCLAIMER - This is a fictional take on Biblical events, it is in no way meant to replace or stand in for the events written in the Bible.

(Luke 1:26-38; Matthew 1:18-25.)

I look at Mary in disbelief, my mind unable to comprehend the words that just came out of her mouth.

"What did you say?" I ask her, my voice clouded with shock.

Her eyes meet mine and they are full of a calm I do not understand.

"I am pregnant, Joseph," she repeats softly with a smile, her voice steady.

My heart starts to pound loudly in my chest as her words sink in.

Pregnant.

The word repeats itself in my head, over and over again, yet I don't seem to fully grasp its meaning.

Pregnant? How can Mary be pregnant? We are not married yet.

We've kept ourselves in the anticipation of our wedding night.

So, how could that be possible?

Unless— no, it can't be.

The thought sends a sharp pang into my heart and I look up at her again.

She's still smiling and it baffles me.

Surely, what could possibly be so amusing in this situation?

Is this some form of prank the maidens are playing nowadays?

"Mary," I begin, my voice thick with emotion. "What do you mean? How can you be pregnant?"

"Joseph, I told you," she replies, her gaze holding mine with an unflinching intensity.

"An Angel appeared to me and told me I would conceive—"

She puts her hand on her stomach—

"by the power of the Holy Spirit, and I would give birth to a son."

I resist the urge to start laughing.

Does she realise the ridiculousness in the words she's uttering?

Or has she gone mad?

I search her eyes for anything that betrays her words, a sign that this is all a joke, but I don't find anything.

She seems to be saying the truth.

But how?

"Mary…" I walk slowly towards her and hold her hands.

I subtly check the temperature of her body.

"Are you sure you're not mistaken? Maybe there was no Angel. Perhaps you're having a fever. There's no way you can be pregnant, Mary."

Hurt flashes across her face and she drops my hands immediately.

"Are you saying I'm lying, Joseph? Do you think I'm making this all up?"

"Mary, if you're pregnant with another man's child, then—"

"Are you accusing me of being unfaithful to you, Joseph!?"

I avert her gaze and look at the ground.

I'm ashamed to admit that the thought crossed my mind.

I know that Mary loves me and that she has a strong moral code, but if she is truly pregnant as she says, isn't that the only reasonable explanation?

"I cannot believe this," Mary says, and I hear her voice break. "Joseph, I am not making any of this up. I am not sick, neither have I lied to you, and I certainly have not been unfaithful!"

I muster the courage to look at her again, and I see the beautiful, innocent and God-fearing girl I fell in love with many years ago.

So… how could this happen? How can she be pregnant? And even if she is, what does she mean by the Spirit?

I'm a firm believer in God, but this talk of Angels is impossible. Angels have not appeared to us in Israel for decades.

There's no way she saw an Angel, let alone spoke to one.

But she's not lying about being pregnant, so could she really have been unfaithful to me with another man?

Who could it be? Is he a fisherman or a rich tax collector?

The mere thought sends tears pricking at the back of my eyes.

My emotions are all tangled up.

A mix of fear, doubt, anger and confusion.

"I need some time to think, Mary," I whisper, the words barely audible from my lips. "I need to think about what happens next."

Mary doesn't say anything.

She just nods, picks up her basket and starts to walk toward the door of my house.

Her expression is passive, but I can see the lingering hurt on her face.

She's about to leave when she turns back to face me.

I'm forced to look her in the eyes again.

"The Angel called me Blessed, Joseph," she says, her tone unwavering. "He said our son's name will be Jesus, and He will rule over God's people forever. Those were his exact words."

I don't say anything, but something about the conviction in her voice makes my heart flutter.

"Cousin Elizabeth is having a child, Joseph. Did you know that? We all thought it couldn't happen again, but it's obvious that nothing is impossible with God."

With that, she leaves and closes the door.

I'm left alone, standing in the middle of the room with a troubled heart and a racing mind.

All night, I toss and turn on my bed.

I am unable to sleep and even more unable to quieten the million thoughts that spin around in my head.

My heart aches with an unfamiliar sensation.

It's a nagging feeling of both loss and betrayal, like someone keeps poking it with the sharp end of a sword.

But yet, deep down, there's still a longing within me.

A longing for Mary, a longing to believe her words.

Deep down, I want to trust her as I always have.

I want to believe that all this is by some divine arrangement, but the weight of her words is impossible to bear.

Getting pregnant without ever knowing a man sounds incredulous.

Even if she's right and she did see an Angel, even if this child was somehow a divine miracle, what difference would it make?

A child conceived out of wedlock?

It would be a huge disgrace.

I'm a devout follower of the law.

The elders know this, my friends know this, even my customers know this.

I visit the temple in Jerusalem regularly, I offer my sacrifices when due and I pay all my taxes.

I have never, for once, intentionally broken the law or accommodated people who did.

The law of Moses is clear on issues such as this.

So what would be said of me when it becomes public knowledge that Mary is pregnant?

Would people think I am responsible?

Would they also believe that it's a miracle from God?

Or will they scorn me and call me a sinner?

I can't let that happen.

But then I cannot bear the thought of bringing Mary to public shame for something I do not yet fully comprehend.

Her chastity was one of the things that drew me to her.

The soft-heartedness of her nature and the humble grace with which she carried herself, despite her astonishing beauty.

Even if she's lying, I love her too much to see her get stoned to death.

But what if she is telling the truth?

It would make more sense if she is.

It is unlike Mary to do anything that breaks the law of God, talk less about a sin as grievous as fornication.

I still remember the determined look in her eyes and the unshaking confidence with which she spoke those words earlier in the day.

She has never been that passionate about anything before.

It made my heart swell with pride.

I think she's telling the truth.

She has to be telling the truth.

Mary would never defile herself with another man or lie against God and his hallowed Angels.

But unfortunately, the law is clear, and I am a man of the law.

I simply cannot ignore it.

As the night draws longer and sleep starts to lay hold of me, I resolve to do what seems to be the only option left to me.

I will divorce her quietly.

I will not expose her to public shame, nor will I claim the child as my own.

It is the only way to protect her and to protect myself and that's the decision I will make.

A thought nags the corners of my senses, but I pay no attention to it.

Then probably a few hours before dawn, I finally drift away into my dreams.

My dream is strange.

There's an unusual sensation that fills my entire body.

I know that I am asleep, yet all my senses are alive, aware, and functioning as if I am awake.

Suddenly, I see a figure. A man.

His face is too bright for me to look at and his body radiates with a beam, stronger than any light I have ever seen.

I immediately know that he's an Angel of the Lord, so I fall flat on my face and bow before him.

"Joseph, son of David," the Angel says.

His presence before me is overwhelming, yet as soon as he speaks, an immediate peace fills my soul and every unease in my system vanishes.

The raging storm that troubled my heart and mind as I was awake seems to just dissipate into the air.

Yet I remain face down on the ground.

"Don't be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins."

Jesus.

The name echoes repeatedly in my mind.

Mary was right!

The child we're having is a miracle from God.

Relief fills my senses alongside something else that feels like excitement.

I want to thank the Angel, to beg Him to forgive my doubt, but before I can say a word, he's gone.

The light vanishes, and I feel his presence depart, but the peace he brought remains, and it settles over me like a warm blanket.

I wake up with a start, the morning light streaming through the window, and I immediately know what I must do.

I jump from my bed with a clarity I have never known before.

The choice that seemed impossible before was now as clear as the skies above my head.

God has spoken and I must obey.

I will not abandon Mary.

I will take her as my wife, and we will raise the child as our own.

It does not matter what the people of Nazareth will say. It does not matter what anybody thinks of me.

The truth is, it never mattered in the first place.

What matters now is that I obey the commandment of the Lord and be a good husband to my wife.

I doubted her before and now I must make amends.

I dress quickly and make my way to her house.

The morning air is cool, and the village is just beginning to stir.

I pay little attention to those who greet me.

I'm filled with strong bursts of energy as I rush through the streets and across the cobbled steps.

I reach Mary’s door and I knock on it rapidly.

I think of the words to say to her to convey how deeply apologetic I am.

To promise her that I will stand by her side and never doubt her again.

The door opens and as she stands before me, I see her in a new light.

My wife.

Beautiful and favoured. A woman blessed by God. The mother of my Lord.

She's visibly surprised to see me.

"Joseph, what—"

"I saw the Angel, Mary!" I cut her off, unable to hide the excitement from my voice. "He confirmed all that you said."

Her confused expression breaks into a huge grin. "Oh, Joseph. Thank the Lord!"

I step closer to her and hold her hands.

"I'm sorry for not believing you, Mary. We will raise this child together and His name will be called Jesus. Truly, nothing is impossible with God."

I see tears well in her eyes. "Nothing is. The Messiah is here."

I squeeze her hands tight as my eyes also start to grow moist.

"How blessed we are, Mary," I say to her. "We shall be called the parents of the Saviour of the world."

We nod our heads together in excitement, unable to contain the childlike joy in our souls, and I pull her into an embrace.

I feel the same peace I felt after the words of the Angel in my dream.

A renewed burst of energy arises in me and I say silent prayer.

The road ahead will not be easy.

There will be whispers, questions, and perhaps even scorn from both our friends and families.

People will mock my integrity and spit on Mary's chastity, but none of that will matter to us.

A bigger purpose has been laid before our feet, and together, our only goal would be to bring Emmanuel into the world and raise him as the son of the Most High.

God is now well and truly going to be with us.

Hallelujah!

Joseph mehn, what a guy.

I wrote this story cause I noticed that most of the focus around this period is usually on Mary.

There’s a lot to learn from Joseph in how he laid aside his pride and ego to submit to doing God’s will, enduring the shame and reproach that must have come with it.

Great guy!

P.S - I call stories like this one the POV Stories of the Bible and I wrote one earlier this year called Peter’s Denial, but I’m not uploading it here until Easter. :-)

(There’s more stories like this in my drafts too that I haven’t gotten to writing yet so, in time…)

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