Memento Mori, Memento Vivere is a Latin phrase that weaves together the duality of human existence:
The inevitability of death and The necessity of living life to its fullest.
Many people only know the first part of the phrase, which translates to “Remember, you must die,” and not the other half, which says, “Remember to live.”
Death is a sensitive topic for a lot of people.
For some, it’s scary to talk or even think about it. For others, it brings back terrible memories.
However you view death, your perspective is probably valid.
It can be scary. It can bring back bad memories. It can be cruel.
But the one thing that death definitely is, is inevitable.
We are all going to die one day.
All men must die.
Or, as the Braavosi say—
We only live once.
That’s the truth.
I know there are beliefs about reincarnation and second lives and all that, but plain and simple, we only get one life.
The Bible says, “And as it is appointed unto men once to die…”
If we’re dying once, that means that we also get to live just once.
So, it’s really a no-brainer that we have to take full advantage of this one life that we get.
Yes, it might sound dark, maybe even morbid, but death has a way of reminding us how precious life is.
Once it’s lost, it can’t be got back, and that’s something I think many people forget.
Or, at least, something many people don’t stay conscious of enough.
We get so caught up in the repetition of our daily life: the routines, the responsibilities, and all of the hustle.
We plan for tomorrow, next month, and the years to come, and we can sometimes forget about the most important moment of our lives, which is the present.
The now. The today.
We forget that life is unpredictable and that everything could change in an instant.
It’s a scary thought, maybe, but I’m not trying to scare anybody.
It’s my earnest prayer that you and I, and the people we care about, live long and memorable lives. Amen.
I’m just saying that if we, even in the tiniest depths of our subconscious, acknowledge the inevitable end of our lives, then maybe we’ll stop taking our moments for granted.
We’ll be reminded that our time is limited and we’ll strive to make the most of every single moment that we get.
Cause it’s just one chance; that’s all you and I have to leave.
Just one attempt.
So…
You have to stop being so scared and start to live.
You have to make the most of every opportunity you get and fully appreciate the things you have.
You have to find more gratitude in the “simple things” that you often overlook.
You have to stop complaining all the time.
You have to put down that phone and do something worthwhile with all the time you keep burning away.
You have to stop consuming so much and start creating too.
You have to stop living your life based on the preconceived notions and expectations of other people and start forging your own path.
You have to stop caring about “what people will say”.
You have to start living with the consciousness that you have a purpose for being here on this Earth.
You have to remember that your time is finite and you can’t afford to keep wasting it.
You have to chase after only the things that matter.
You have to say “YES” to the things that excite you and “NO” to the things that drain you.
You have to love deeper, to laugh harder, and to embrace the unknown with less hesitation.
You have to remember that you will die so that you’ll also remember to live.
Now, you might say, “Ebun, we’re a product of our thoughts, so we really shouldn’t be thinking so much about death.”
I agree, and I’m not asking for anybody to develop a morbid obsession with death.
This is my perspective:
Let’s remain aware of the fact that we have just one life to live, not so that we can live in constant fear of the end, but so that we can make the most of the beginning, the middle, and every single second in-between.
This awareness is the reason people travel more, love intentionally, chase their most ridiculous dreams, and strive to fulfil their purpose.
They’ve decided to maximise the few years they get to spend on Earth, regardless of the risks they have to take or the potential pain they could suffer.
That, to me, is admirable.
Someone once said: Today is a gift, and that’s why it’s called the present.
And I think that makes a lot of sense.
The pain of regret is much worse than the pain of failure.
Or the pain of embarrassment. Or the pain of shame. Or the pain of insecurity.
Or the pain of whatever it is that is holding you back from doing the things you know you should do.
The things you want to do.
You don’t want to reflect on life in 30, 40 years with only “What if…” questions to show for it:
What if I had taken that chance?
What if I had asked her out?
What if I had applied for that job?
What if I didn’t waste so much time scrolling?
What if I did this…? What if I did that…?
It’s a scary reality.
At least for me.
One of my biggest fears is to have lived a meaningless life after I die. To just come and go, with no impact, with no mark, with no substance.
I don’t want to be on my deathbed and be filled with regrets, unfulfilled dreams, and forgotten aspirations.
Since I get just one chance, why should my life be average and ordinary like other billions of lives that have been lived?
No, that can’t be right.
It shouldn’t be, and I genuinely struggle to understand people who live their lives with such a one-dimensional focus on “having fun” and “enjoyment”.
Doesn’t make any sense.
That being said, the future should not be our concern.
It’s simply a result of the actions we take today, so we only need to focus on the now, and the things we do now.
Live in the moment.
A quote by Lao Tzu says:
“If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present.”
There’s no better time to live than now.
Don’t worry about what has happened or what is to come.
Focus on what you can do NOW.
Pursue What Matters
It’s so easy to get caught in things that don’t serve us like jobs we don’t love, relationships that drain us, habits that are slowly killing us…
There’s no time for that.
All the choices you make and the things you focus on must align with what really brings you joy, peace, and fulfilment.
Embrace the Small Moments
Life is made up of tiny moments, so appreciate each of them.
The cold wind at night. The message notification from that person you like. Watching your favourite show for the 100th time.
Enjoy every single one of them while you have them.
Let Go of Fear
You can disagree with me, but fear lives only in the mind.
It doesn’t really exist.
The moment you confront it is the moment it disappears.
So, don’t be afraid to take chances. Don’t let fear hold you back from experiencing the crazy things that life can offer.
Post that video. Audition for that role. Tell your parents you’d like to leave the house more often. End that relationship.
Endless possibilities are on the other side of all the things that make you afraid.
Live With Gratitude
Every morning that you wake up, thank God.
Life is painfully fleeting, so be grateful when you get another chance to see a new day.
We can’t give life and we can’t make life.
So, the least we can do is to say “thank you” to the One that makes life and gives life.
For me, as much as I hope and pray to live long, I know that in the end, what matters is not how long we live but how well we live.
That’s why there should be a striving for being something that’s much bigger than us.
Honestly, there’s nothing wrong with wanting a simple, low-key life.
Although I do believe we’re all created for greatness, one way or another.
You don’t have to postpone your being happy “till I’m rich” or “when I get this or that”.
You can find it all around you.
Stop being a passive observer in your own life; start being an active participant.
Like it or not, you and I are running out of time.
That’s why we must live.
“There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die...”
- Ecclesiastes 3:1-2.
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To be sincere, after reading this a part of me tried to fight every word I knew was true. Death has always been something that terrifies me even from a very young age. I hate hearing "may her soul rest in peace, may his soul rest in peace".
Now, death does not scare me. I am just scared I won't leave up to my name "Prisca - known for her achievements and wisdom."
Today is a normal day of my life. Same blanket to fold, same gallons to be filled by water, same clothes to wash, same rice to cook and more. And, it feels odd. It's just like living in a cycle of routines. It's not draining and it's a lie if I would say it's also fun. Going home back from my school, I received a notification and I am the type of person who doesn't care to any notifs unless it's a message. But, the opening of your mail truly hooked my attention. It's not just some sort of same notifications I always received, it's a reminder. A reminder to live my life, even a little. Because, it would basically make a big difference.
Carpe Diem has become my shibboleth but frankly, it's not that very effective. I can't seize every milliseconds of my life, not at all (blindly). Your mail is the one responsible for tying the broken thread, and pulled me back to LIFE. I am the type of person who voluntarily look for lessons. I let it to be the one who will volunteer to meet me. This help a lot for a 16 year old girl like me. Any time, I'll turn 17 and I will live my life to the fullest. Seizing my last year as a kid, and that's already the definition of not letting my life unlived.