the lies we tell ourselves
As an avid social media user, everyday I am exposed to a lot of opinions. And I mean, A LOT.
When I still used Twitter regularly, I would scroll for hours, just absorbing different thoughts from different people.
The Good, The Bad, and the Extremely Ugly.
It’s crazy and like Hank said-
I came to the conclusion that as humans, we are NOT wired for the intake of so much different information everyday. I wrote about that already here.
Anyways, my point is, I have seen firsthand, many misconceptions that have been repeated so many times, that some of us actually view them as the truth.
Some of these “quotes” and “lines” have been adopted to make us feel better about certain situations. While some are just pure and unrealistic internet opinions that don’t hold any weight in the real world.
I’m going to be dissecting a few of them in this post, so walk with me, and sorry in advance if you catch any stray bullets.
1. “Nobody knows what they’re doing.”
Often times, we use this line to comfort ourselves when we’re having a hard time figuring something out and it seems like everyone else is making progress in that same thing.
It could be work or school or relationships.
So we tell ourselves “I’ll be fine, nobody knows what they are doing anyways.”
But that is very untrue because a lot of people do know what they are doing.
They have figured out their life’s purpose or they have put plans in place that will help them achieve the things that they want to achieve.
The difference between them and you is that they have taken the time to PLAN. So, telling yourself that everybody is just as confused as you are is a terrible “copium”.
You have to wake up.
Rather than bask in that narrative, channel your energy towards meditation and planning.
Figure out things you have to do and the goals you want to achieve in your lifetime, then create systems, habits, and learning objectives that will help you reach there.
You can start with something as little as learning a new skill before the end of the year.
Not everyone is living life off “pure vibes”.
Some people have their whole lives planned out and some even had it planned out for them before they were born.
So, while life is unpredictable and random things can happen at random times, it’s still much better to take charge of your life, rather than to just flow with whatever currents life throws at you.
Feel me?
2. “I deserve a soft life, I can’t be stressed.”
Says who?
Who told you that you “deserve” a life of peace and riches and luxury, especially when you’ve not even done any work for it?
Who told you that you even “deserve” anything?
Sorry to break it to you but life is not a bed of Roses.
And even if it were, some thorns will often prick you and probably make you cry and bleed.
I’m not even being pessimistic.
Now, I’m well aware of privilege and how some people are blessed to have the “good” things of life just handed over to them, especially from birth (Wealth, Beauty, Connections, etc.)
If you’re one of those people.
Congratulations, genuinely.
Enjoy your privilege. Don’t oppress anyone with it and don’t let anybody make you feel guilty for enjoying it.
But if you’re like me; no $1m trust fund or extremely wealthy parents or overarching sex appeal, and you think you will get a good and comfortable life by just “manifesting” it on the internet, then I have some news for you.
The thing is, nothing comes without something.
You have to put in the required effort before you claim to “deserve” anything from anything.
If you get what you want without working for it, it’s because someone else already did the work for you to get it.
Or you stole it. One of the two.
So, my sisters (and some brothers too), you know there’s nobody coming to save you, and you are very far from the “soft” life you keep dreaming of.
It might be time to spend fewer days fantasising about it and more days working towards it.
3. “I owe nobody an explanation.”
I actually agree with you on this one.
You don’t.
It’s your life yeah? You can live it however you want.
UNTIL…
It starts to affect the people around you (i.) that you are responsible for or (ii.) that care about you.
When you’re at this point, you must own up to your every action and take full responsibility for the things that you do.
Your life is not lived in isolation.
This statement closely ties in with the “do whatever makes you happy” narrative.
In many cases, the things you do and the words you say will have a positive or negative effect on your friends, parents, co-workers, etc.
It’s prideful of you to think that you can do whatever you like without anybody questioning you, especially when the ripple effects of your actions directly affect them.
4. “You only live once.”
Sigh.
Why do we like to justify living anyhow mehn?
We have so many schools of thought that encourage us to live with reckless abandon, doing whatever we want and thinking “damn the consequences.”
It is well.
While it is technically true that you only live once, nowadays it’s just an excuse many people use to justify their impulsive decisions.
And that’s where the issue is.
I’m all for “do it for the plot” moments, but only when the possible outcome is not something that could negatively affect my life.
I encourage people to face their fears, take risks, and be spontaneous, but never when the potential consequences could be disastrous to your life.
You have to be very careful with the choices you make, don’t use “YOLO” to abruptly thwart or derail your life.
Side note - Since we are all going to “only live once”, is it not better to focus on living life to the fullest while making a lasting impact, rather than just living a life wholly dedicated to “fun” and pleasure?
5. “Money can’t buy happiness.”
I promise you, it can.
It absolutely can.
What money, like every other material thing, can’t do is sustain your joy.
But it can definitely buy you the temporal spasms of pleasure called happiness. In fact, the more money you have, the more happiness you can buy.
Money will not give you eternal gladness.
“Becoming rich” is even a terrible motivation for living and working, in my opinion.
But don’t let anybody gaslight you into thinking money is evil.
Money is not evil. The obsessive and desperate desire for money is what is evil because it can make men do crazy things.
Make your money, please. And make lots of it.
Then spend it however you like.
Plus, if anybody tells you that “all rich people are miserable”, put your hand on their shoulder, then tell them to get their money up and stop hating.
6. “What will be will be.”
No.
The only thing that will be is what you make to be.
I once wisely quoted, “If you leave your life to chance, you have no chance.”
When did I quote that? Doesn’t matter, mind your business.
It might be tempting to leave the happenings of your life in the hands of fate but it’s ill-advised to be so passive.
You might be tired and frustrated because nothing is working and all your plans keep failing but remember that while you can’t control some things, you can control how you react to those things.
The choices you make in reaction are what will adjust the trajectory of your life as it goes on.
You do have the power to influence everything that “be’s” in your life.
So, take charge.
And that’s all for today.
Part 2? Guess we’ll see.
As usual, I enjoyed this, especially the memes. If you only come here and post memes, I'll read😂😂
Love the memes in between